An attack of ‘the normals’

I’m still not feeling particularly mental*, in fact I think what I might be experiencing an attack of ‘the normals’ Since I can’t write about being mental I thought I’d do one of those meandering ‘ what WeeGee thinks’ posts instead. I’m scared you will all forget about me if I don’t blog; if you all forgot about me I would almost certainly have one of my mental turns…..

The first thing I have to do today is give a mahoosive thank you type shout out to our very own Depressed Moose. If you want to know what I have to thank him for visit this post and listen to the lovely music. I thought Nik Kershaw was pretty cool when I was a wee thing – he stole my heart and I think he still has a little bit of it to this day. My small(ish) obsession with Mr Kershaw is well known amongst my friends and family and one year I received not one, not two, but THREE copies of his greatest hits album as Christmas gifts. And I kept all three.

I was late for work today. Me being late isn’t really news because I am not what you describe as a punctual person** but being late for work when you don’t actually start until TWO IN THE AFTERNOON and only live TEN MINUTES AWAY is a tad embarrassing. I was late because I left myself too much time to get ready so had time to engage in a spot of clothes related faffing. I wanted to wear a very particular black dress. I could find at least three squillion other (largely the same) black dresses but none of them would do. In the end I gave up and decided to wear a navy blue one instead and there then commenced a period of shoe related faffing***

My emails were a bit of a giggle today. First there was the one asking me to send a copy of something to A**** Hobbs and B**** Nobbs…. Oh how I laughed. Then there was this one which had an intriguing title:

Hello! Are you female?

Hello, Are You A Female, are you still single and searching, My name is BLANK male, and I am now 40 years..separated three years ago, have 2 kids from previous marriage, I am a Christian. To me age doesn’t count. I am only looking for a true love and life partner anywhere in the world… I am an African. What I love most is the word TRUTH.I speak English and my local language. I do car hire service work in a small Hotel in the city of lagos. I am Ready and willing to relocate any time and to be utilised with my love. This is only a sincere relationship request from me. Thank you.

Ready to relocate to be utilised with his love? Takes all sorts I guess.

Sadly there were no typos today. Did I mention how much I enjoy a good typo? I enjoy them so much I collect them. Here are a few of my favourites:

Blank is unable to attend due to a curse

Dear Sir/Madman****

I look forward to meeting you tomato

And now for my absolute favourite of all which I must confess was my own:

Dear Angus.

That one isn’t funny unless you know I missed out the ‘G’. And I sent it before I realised. Mortified didn’t come close to covering it…..

Meanwhile in other news I have just realised that I left my phone at work ON THE ONLY WEEKEND OF THE ENTIRE YEAR that I can’t get in to retrieve it. Oh bums and stuff. Nothing else to report today save that I am off to listen to Nik Kershaw for a bit

Lots and lots of love, WeeGee (I won’t let the sun go down on me)*****

PS – Please feel free to send me your amusing typos to add to my collection.

*I know! This must be some kind of record or something

**I inherited this particular trait from my mother who is also always late for everything. I have very vivid memories of being marched to school at break neck speed whilst trying to follow the completely baffling instruction “Take your time and hurry up”

***I’m sorry – I know that was a boring story I blame it on the current attack of ‘the normals’

****When I received this I thought….. ‘fair enough’

***** That’s a bit of an ‘in’ joke. It’s not very funny but I couldn’t help it.