An irritating post

Good evening gentlepeople of WordPress. How’s it all going? I trust that you’re all AWESOME and stuff like that? I thought it was about time I reported for duty. It’s been a week or so which seems to me to be a reasonable blogging interval for a busy WeeGee. Anyway – to cut a long story short by repeating myself – here I am, Reporting For Duty after a short blogging interval.

To be perfectly honest I still haven’t figured out what I’ve mostly been being since the last time I blogged. On the one hand I think I might have been irritable but on the other I think I might have been irritated. I’ve been thinking about it for most of the day and eventually it turned into one of those impossible, hurty-head, chicken and egg things so I decided to tell you that I’ve been both irritated and irritable and that I don’t exactly know which of the two came first. More to the point I don’t suppose it really matters to anyone apart from me……

Ever since I can remember things have had a tendency to get ‘under my skin’. For my part, I see this as an integral part of my personality but the headshrinker-type-people often cite it as one of my ‘difficulties’. Apparently thinking about things until they are under your skin in such a way that you are so irritated (or irritable) that you feel physically unwell is just one of the many Great Fun Things you have to learn to live with when you’re mental. And yes. I’m well aware I could have done a better job of constructing that last sentence but I’ve written it now and if you read it slowly enough I think you’ll get the gist anyway.

The list of things that have either made me irritable or irritated me in the past two weeks feels pretty much endless. It all started with a whole load of nonsense on WordPress, then there were the stupid celebrity scales which were (bafflingly) linked to the prevalence of eating disorders, then there was the sign that said “You would be pleased to know that our coffee is only made with organic milk” (which implied to me that it WASN’T), then there was my upstairs neighbour BEHAVING LIKE A DICK, and then there was this, which one of my ‘friends’ kindly shared with me on Facebook:

I don’t know about you but when one of my light bulbs stops working I don’t fix it I BUY A BLEEDING NEW ONE. And I really don’t think that’s much of an analogy for a relationship.

Harrumph!

Anyway – before I started getting irritated (or irritable) about all the things that have irritated me (or made me irritable) I had a serious point to make: I got genuinely bothered by two things (nastiness and irresponsible coverage of eating disorders) and then the bothersome things got under my skin, and into my head, and before I knew it EVERYTHING IN THE WHOLE WORLD WAS DEEPLY IRRITATING. What I’m really trying to say is that I think I might be looking for the off switch again because if my brain is busy being irritated (or irritable) I get irritated (or irritable) ABOUT EVERYTHING IN THE WHOLE WORLD.

And no – there isn’t really a moral to this particular story because I’m too irritated (or irritable) to think of one but I did wonder if you might like to hear a bit of Frank Turner because that most definitely WON’T be irritating:

Meanwhile in other news some of the things I was panicking and worrying about seem to have subsided. Of course, that may well be because I am preoccupied with the irritating stuff but the main things is that for now, I am feeling much better thank you very much. Nothing else to report today save that I have run out of things to report.

Love you all lots like jelly tots.

WeeGee